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The Red Stain of Shame
I’m on my period.
I’m not really, but lets pretend I am. Do I have a reason to be embarrassed about that?
Let me put this in context for you.
I was watching a reality tv show (a guilty pleasure actually) and there were a group of people eating at a restaurant. Somehow an argument erupted and one of the guys mentioned that one of the girls was on her period and he threw a tampon at her. (Apparently he was holding it in his pocket for her because she didn’t want to carry a purse)
Of course, everyone starts laughing hysterically and at that point I had to scratch my head.
He clearly did that to embarrass her which made me wonder why is it embarrassing to have a menstrual cycle? I’ll all for privacy so I’m not saying we need to shout it from the walls, or give a production every time that time of the month comes; but why does it have to be an embarrassing, or insulting thing?
To me that’s like getting into an argument and saying, “you just urinated!” as a zinger. Not very effective huh? Probably because both men and women urinate.
I really would like to understand where the shame and embarrassment comes from. My guess is that it has to do with the feminine cover up that’s so prevalent.
An article in the Journal of Sex Research touches on this issue.
“Although menstruation is a natural, reproductive process, it bears a strong cultural taboo that commands that it not be seen, discussed, or in most ways, acknowledged (Kissling, 1996a; Roberts, 2004). This desire to keep menstruation secret is often paired with an attitude that menstruation is dirty and disgusting (Martin, 1996; Roberts). Many girls report shame about being seen with a menstrual product or, worse yet, about bleeding through clothing, and some adolescent girls report that they are embarrassed simply by the fact that they menstruate (Lee & Sasser-Coen, 1996; Kissling, 1996b; Roberts). These feelings are likely compounded by media portrayals of menstruation as a hygienic crisis (Havens & Swenson, 1988; Raftos, Jackson, & Mannix, 1988; Simes & Berg, 2000).” Source
How do you feel about it? Is a womans monthly cycle a hygienic crisis? Are you embarrassed to buy tampons in the store? How about your daughter, what kind of images are in her mind?
By the way, an interesting site to visit is the Museum of Menstruation and Womens Health . Some of the artwork is a little off-the-wall for my taste, yet it’s a great place to get a little history about menstrual cycles, menstrual products, contraceptives, and the like.
Hey I saw that show. That was just foolishness.