Being Courted - LOOOONG post

[Heather]

Ever since I started freelancing, I have missed working in my old career (eLearning/Instructional Design).  I was burned at my last job and been a little nervous to jump back in.  So I opened up my resume and got more of a response than I expected.  I've been doing the interview thing for about 3 weeks now.  Anyway, one job was perfect in respects of the job function, the team, the management.  The problem?  It was an hour away.  I was in touch with the HR partner for a while after the interview, then I didn't hear anything.  They were having funding issues, but got the go ahead.  I voiced my concern about the drive time and they agreed to let me telecommute part of the time after I get up and running.

It's a 60-90 contract job to help them get over the hump with a chance of extensions and I was psyched.  When I told them I was still interested but needed a few weeks to wrap things up.  It took them a day to get back with me and we agreed on a 2/25 start date. While I was waiting for them to get back with me, I got another nibble.  A permanent job at a company with a stellar repuation for my field.  The benefits would be crazy good.  The commute is only 15 minutes.  The pay is better than the contract gig.  They contacted me the same day they posted the job.  The HR person said the manager was extremely interested but can't do an interview 2/11.  I am going on the interview.  This was the job I was waiting for and it came AFTER I accepted a job.

Here's my question.  If this interview goes well and they offer me something, how horrible will it be for me to back out of the other job?  I fee like I owe it to my career to give it a go, but I feel bad too.  ANy suggestions?  Should I honor my verbal commitment or back out of the other job now and take my chances?  I dont' know what to doooooooooooooooo...thanks!

[DJ]

I think you still have time to weigh the pros/cons as the 25th is a little bit away.

I understand you don't want to let down the company but really you have to do what's best for you because trust me the company will always do what's best for them.

Still, you don't want to be unprofessional or burn bridges so let's think about this.

You go on the interview and you don't get the job- you are safe.

You go on the interview and you do get the job- you have to make a choice.

If it were me and I REALLY, REALLY wanted the other job I'd go on the interview and hope to hear back soon. Then I'd let the other company know ASAP. I wouldn't wait until the last minute to tell them, but I also wouldn't cancel the gig if I was uncertain if I was going to get the other one.

At my hubby's job they are opening a new location in NY. A manager was set to move to NY and they hired all these people, etc. A FEW DAYS before everything was supposed to happen, the manager quit and moved to TX because he got a better offer. Just like that, bam, gone. So it does happen but I say in order to display the utmost professionalism don't leave people hanging the day before you are supposed to show up.

BUT here's a discussion that kind of says the opposite of what I've said. See what you think. Ask Annie has also covered this.

[Heather]

Many thanks to you!  Your advice was very similar to what I got from the negotiation expert on Monster.com.  I don't "play the game" very well at all, so I'm going to feel guilty until I finally get the other interview out of the way.  Right now I have the contact job and worse thing that can happen is I get the other one and I have to have one very difficult conversation.  Honestly, the thought of the tuition reimbursement I can get from the permanent position is very alluring.  I'll let you know how it goes!  THanks again!

[DJ]

So.....how'd it go?

[Heather]

Ah!  Well, I didn't get the job I was hoping to get, but got another offer within the same week (unexpected).  Here's the thing - I declined them both.  Call it a gut reaction, but I didn't feel either job was a good fit.  And as a reward for holding out, I got a long term contract that I start in about a week.  It's perfect because it's a 1099 (I like being my own boss), work from home, but I still get a chance to have virtual collegues!  Thanks for asking and I can't wait to get started!